How to get more honest Feedback

If you are a parent or have kids around you find that they often give you honest feedback without thinking. It’s brutal. But when the food doesn’t meet their standard they say. — This is disgusting.

But when we get older a filter of diplomacy add-in and we become more polite. Asking yourself what does the listener want to hear. I guess you might say, but I’m always a straight shooter and say what I want. That might be true, but more likely you have a filter for that as well.

Some people with long hard problems with drugs or alcohol quite often missing the diplomacy. There is an expression.

There are so many examples of projects that have gone to shit because of this specific reason. And it could, for the most cases, been saved. But if you don’t have the communication channel up

So why is honest feedback so hard? I think we do it too seldom. If we started to train yourself to gave positive feedback more often we would develop a skill to be relevant.

In the eye of a child. How to use your kids for honest feedback. The story says that music hitmaker from Sweden, Max Martin, took a demo and played it for some kids. If they danced to it and liked it, it was a hit.

Explain something to a five-year-old. Take whatever complex question and think how you could explain it to a five-year-old. If you can do that, and if the kid can take your concept and explain it. Then you understand it.

When I got the question from my oldest kid “Dad, what do you do at work?” I tried to explain.

My kid said.

I asked if he understands that world. “YES! That’s you, dad. Like Gyro Gearloose” (that’s uppfinnarjocke in Swedish). Okay! Then you know what I do in my days. Not truly what I’m doing but close enough. So the moral story here that I don’t understand my job. Not fully.

I have been terrible bad in giving feedback. Like really really bad. And my analysis in that is that I need some help…

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